Tag: Retail
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Why? Because.
The current mask debate has come to epitomise the woeful society we now inhabit. Now, ever since the COVID question arose, there have been pro-maskers. After all, it is a natural response to don items of clothing for the purposes of protection against an environmental threat. A coat, a hat, a pair of gloves. Masking…
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24/7
On 23 June, the Government offered up a perspective on masks: ‘the evidence of the benefit of using a face covering to protect others is weak and the effect is likely to be small’. As we now know, the world can change very quickly. The new norm dictates that the same goes for science. Not…
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Fastest Finger First
A new mini-series about the Ingrams who finessed their way to the jackpot on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? is being screened in the UK. With an accomplice, they blagged their way to the jackpot through a series of coughs (correct answers) and nose blows (incorrect answers). It all unfolded on 9th and 10th…
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Shop and Search
So, the lockdown is being reviewed as promised but will almost certainly be extended – no surprises there, then. As time drags on in splendid isolation, and domestic violence, obesity, and suicides spike, we will doubtless focus on the slide that we vicariously permitted when our elected representatives pushed it all through into law without…
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Venture Catalysts
Day God-knows-what in the Big Brother House and who’s going to retrieve the samurai sword from our intestines after our economic hari kari? Don’t hold your breath. If there’s light at the end of the tunnel, it’s probably some minister with a torch looking for another absurd policy. It’s the most joined-up we’ve been for…
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Irony Deficiency
Well, it was inevitable, I suppose. Not only have we Fosbury-flopped into a rights-less chasm, but the CSE Grade III philosophy salon has been issuing guidance for the interpretation of the Government guidance and the Coronavirus Act. It’s provided the perfect platform for the nation’s professional underlings to take their lives out of first gear,…
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Basket Cases
The power of social media: a critical care nurse makes an emotional video about empty shelves in stores. It goes coronaviral. Major stores decided that we needed to support our NHS staff, so they introduced NHS hours for staff to shop where there are replenished shelves. Of course, staff work shifts, so not everyone can…
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Closure Ayes
If you’re panicking at the prospect of a few months of social distancing, spare a thought for your friendly neighbour burglars and junkies, who will see the window for opportunist crime closing down faster than a Rolf Harris comeback tour. They’ll probably be able to apply for Universal Credit, though, and we should endeavour to…
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Keep Calm and Cory On
A brief stroll through the town centre yesterday, and I had to check my watch to make sure it wasn’t 1st April. At first, I thought I’d encountered a cardiologist cycling club charity ride, what with all the people pedalling about with their green surgical masks. You almost don’t know where to begin. The panic…
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It’s All About the Money, Honey
Every day is bringing fresh computations of hysteria and nitwittery. People used to cough to cover up a fart; now they’re farting to cover up a cough. But back to the bug and more pertinently, the government’s fiscal stimulus. It was never going generate a Joker-strength smile for everybody, but then again, the money pit…
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