Rest in Peace, OJ Simpson.

Some are saying he will now, knowing his wife’s killer is dead.

It’s just a pity that dear old Johnnie Cochran isn’t alive to deliver the eulogy.

He would have doubtless convinced the congregation to have completely exonerated cancer.

‘If the coffin don’t fit, you must acquit!’

That is, if it is a coffin, and not a giant carton, that they squeeze the mass of OJ into.

People had remained restrained after the not guilty verdict, but now that he’s dead, the gloves are off. He’s now universally deemed a murderer, even though a court of law had said otherwise.

The rule of law tends to be respected and upheld when it delivers verdicts that people like. When it doesn’t, the law is an ass.

At the end of the day, he shuffled off his mortal coil an innocent man, and that, ladies and gentlemen, is that.

I can’t wait to see the funeral procession, though, with all those cop cars following his hearse.

I don’t know who they would have got to drive the white Bronco, but with OJ dead, someone would surely have had a stab at it.

As for the LA Police, well, they are remaining silent on the death, though as it’s now Spring, there is a rumour that they may ask Mark Fuhrman to plant some gloves in his memory.

Watch out for a new film with an adjusted storyline coming to a cinema near you.

Denzel’s waiting by the phone.