Wowsers!

Liverpool FC appear to have been sucked into the cyclical, psychopathic managerial money-go-round, plumping for Arne Slot as a replacement for Jürgen Klopp.

Slot is, according to Virgil van Dijk, ‘one of the better Dutch coaches’ currently plying their trade.

Oh dear.

Erik ten Hag is the best, which should be triggering canned laughter over every crackling tannoy in the land. Erik at least won the Dutch League, while the best that Slot has been able to muster has been the Dutch Cup.

He’s a sort of seven Tag.

Had anybody ever seen or heard of him before last week?

We should all however be thankful that clubs have weaned themselves off the crystal meth of Steve Bruce, Mark Hughes, Stuart Pearce, and Tim Sherwood, even though Graham Potter and Southgate remain holed up at the O.K. Corral of OK, desperate to blast their way out to a big earner.

Even as we speak, El Tel is banging on the pearly gates, begging to be let out for one last crack at a foolhardy phat contract, and don’t be fooled by Sven wanting to be LFC boss for just one charity game. Make no mistake, he’d spotted the biggest backdoor opening since Ulrika.

It’s probably only the Man United connection that prevented Ralf Rangnick from ‘expressing an interest’ through his agent, as is their way.

Arne will probably do OK in general terms, just as Erik has, but ‘OK’ doesn’t cut it at the very highest level.

With Hank Schrader and Walter White now on the scene, the North West is about to break bad.

They’d have been better off pumping their £9.4m into a slot machine rather than a Slot unseen.