Category: Politics
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General Erections
We’re a fortnight or so into the General Election campaign, and frankly it’s not pretty – unless pretty boring counts. Slippery Sunake has slithered from gaffe to gaffe, and the latest D-Day debacle has surely sealed his fate. I wouldn’t be surprised if the Tories ditched him mid-campaign in a coup d’étwat. As for Slur…
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Confidence Trick
Chaos reigns in the parallel universe of UK Politics. Hard-right loon Natalie Hellfucke has defected to Labour. Not only that, but Sir Drear has been parading her centre-stage. Not sure what the fuss is all about, though? It’s hardly a surprise that Starmer, a man who has no evident political compass, is a ruthless and…
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Bully Beef Curtains
Apparently, a guy called Navalny has died in a Russian prison. He might have choked on a Chicken McNugget while fooling about on his Playstation, for all we know. Meanwhile, at the time of writing, attacks on Gaza have killed at least 28,775 Palestinians and wounded 68,552 since October 7 2023. What with all this Eurocentric media…
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Not Good for the Gander
Another day, another fuck to add to the cluster. Kemi Badenoch – remember her? The hapless grunt in the crowd who fortuitously caught the baseball of opportunity and accordingly concluded she was a major league player. Yes, she actually believes she might end up as the PM. Mind you, considering the shitpipes who did snag…
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Scobie Don’t!
Hallelujah! T’is the season of gaslighting! Spunk sponge Omid Scobie has been probing the shallow waters of incredulity in suggesting that a mistranslation of his book led to the unmasking of the ‘royal racist’. Around the globe, translators are flummoxed because they’ve spent a lifetime translating verbs, nouns, adjectives, and other units of language that…
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Shit Hoyle
How many of us are looking forward to a holiday in Stockton-on-Tees? None. Because it’s a shithole. Let’s take a moment to celebrate all the national journalists who have flocked to buy properties in Stockton. Unfortunately, there are none. Because it’s a shithole. Even the inhabitants of Stockton think it’s a shithole – once they’ve…
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Stop the Ride
Oh dear – the chickens are coming home to roost for Slur Keir. He had previously latched onto the antisemitism gig in order to defenestrate Jezza, and now finds he’s mounted the wrong horse. If only the king of cardboard could argue that criticism of Israel is not antisemitism…. Bummer. That’s what happens to people…
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D’You Wanna Be In My Gang?
You can throw glitter on a turd, but it’s still a turd. After something sparkly finally stuck to Keir Starmer yesterday, the nihilist knight remarked that the protester ‘didn’t know him’. That was evident from the fact that glitter had been launched, not acid. It’s not yet known whether the assailant will be charged with…
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Them Apples
Slur Keith Starmer is now determined to treat people smugglers on a par with terrorists. Bravo. I’m not sure whether that means he’s going to be launching missiles onto the channel dinghies or putting ISIS warlords up in taxpayer-funded, plush hotel accommodation in Kent. Don’t expect Inaction Man to provide any clarification soon. Amazingly, Donkey…
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Doing a Runner
It took a while, but the country has come to its senses. Johnson has been canned. Or rather, a select committee tee-ed him up, and he fell on his (pork) sword. Like Phillip Schofield, whom we have not seen for a few days, Phat Phuck has done a runner. As fagged-out Phil poignantly asked, ‘How…
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