Tag: Health
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Truss Issues
Back in the day, to truss meant to tie up the wings and legs of (a chicken or other bird) before cooking. The prey got trussed before it got stuffed. And now, life imitates art, as they say. Therese Coffey, her of the Savile cigar and fist-screwed glass, is the new Health Secretary. I’ll wager…
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Trite Said Fred
I was never a committed cheerleader of the lockdowns, but even less supportive of the fact that the decisions to enter them and then exit them have continually been based on bonkers logic. We’re now shelving 100% of restrictions after 69% of the adult population has been vaccinated. You don’t need to be a numbers…
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Unskinny Bop
It was desperately sad to hear that former Big Brother desperado Nikki Grahame had succumbed to anorexia. Desperately sadder still was the media puff about a lack of awareness of eating disorders. Please, somebody turn that telescope around. Surely, the most pertinent concern should fall on the apparent obsession with the modern-day freak show of…
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Bloody Clots
Probability is a funny only thing. We can become as despondent about our vanishing chances of winning the lottery as we might become paranoid about being afflicted by a rare illness, and both at about the same percentages. Current odds of a fatal blood clot after being spritzed with the AZ vaccine are approximately 1…
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Cock Walking
‘One day you’re cock of the walk, the next a feather duster’ reads the strapline on Piers Morgan’s Twitter profile. More like, ‘One day you’re cock of the walk, the next a cock walking’. There, I’ve fixed it for you. Morgan’s supporters have cohered behind the #TeamPiers banner although this does seem to have attracted…
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Whale Being
Unless you are self-employed, you are likely part of a 21st century workforce and will almost certainly been struck by the wave of organisational well-being initiatives. Bosses are frantically setting up helplines, arranging gym discounts, and handing out snack-sized, sample nutty bars among the seemingly more level-headed of interventions. I’ve also witnessed aromatherapists, magicians, and…
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Faking Like the Clappers
What better way to whistle up a distraction than to reintroduce the dreaded ‘clap’? An opportunity to draw out all the vacant virtue-signallers who will kick-start an orgy of sneerful shaming that swells the sycophantic masses. It’s transparent and ultimately brings fatigue, but it is one that remains in the corona-charlatan toolbox. And there is…
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Jibber Jabber
This week, I received my very first flu jab, which was unexpectedly painless. In fact, I was so euphoric afterwards, I logged on and purchased £5k worth of Microsoft licences. In all seriousness though, it is a toughie to comprehend that one of the primary anti-vax rationales is a conspiracy theory that we are all…
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Cheato Jesus
In a week when Cheeto Jesus offered the first hint that he might give up the spectre of his presidency, Cheato Jesus in Argentina gave up the ghost. There will be much penned about the life and times of Diego Maradona, typically juxtaposing the genius and villain motifs. But the infamous Hand of God was…
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False Positive
We have come to realise that online connectivity made the world a smaller place, but it is becoming more of a stretch to see social media as a positive? That is not so say that it has no advantageous features, but to me, it’s been long merrily frankensteining. The overriding challenge is that the pace…
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