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Motion Lotion
A year on, and commentators are seeking to assess Keir Starmer’s progress as the Labour Leader. Now, that’s a real toughie because he hasn’t really done anything. Try to imagine an Israeli opposition leader never managing to surpass level-pegging with Hitler, and you’ll probably be in the right ballpark. In its wildest dreams (which judging…
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Police Farce
While the rank stupidity of a tightly grouped demonstration during a virus pandemic is arguable, let us not ignore that the protest against bolstered police power was met with the flagrant abuse of what fuzz already holds. That was exemplified by beating the crap out of mild-mannered bystanders after having first scarpered from less easy…
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Priti Grim
News of Priti Patel’s expenses claim of £77,269.40 for highbrow eyebrows has emerged, and we await the cost of Johnson’s back, sack, and crack with spew-wrenching anticipation. Dame Dick should be able to help out on that score. After all, she’s got a track record of doing Brazilians for nothing. The most mind-boggling titbit of…
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The Spoils of Whore
The latest COVID-death figures reflect that 3,572 people with no identified pre-existing condition have succumbed to the bug. A further breakdown reveals that 87 of them were under 40. In 2019, 1,752 perished in road traffic accidents, which aside from the bereaved families and the emergency services in attendance impacted nobody. We never shut down…
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Not a Dry Eye
Less than a year ago, Bristol police stood aside and watched a mob tear down a statue and hoof it into the harbour. The top cop on the scene gave an interview explaining how he ‘understood’ the protestors. He probably understands them a little better today. Those chickens are not only coming home to roost…
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A Wee Cranky
Nicola Sturgeon is looking a wee cranky after some committee concluded that she misled the Scots Parliament, and her pants were metaphorically ablaze. Whenever you see the term ‘committee’, expect to witness a hatful of controversy and vendetta, dressed up as principled authority. This one appeared biased because it didn’t contain the now mandatory SNP…
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Foot. Aim. Fire!
Having just witnessed some heavy-handed policing of some drippy sit-in at Clapham Common, the essence of the fledgling Policing Bill has now crystallised. A new maximum penalty of 10 years in jail for effectively hurting people’s feelings is on the cards. It seems a tad weird that a Government that claims to care about freedom…
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Dick Out
It is peak irony when a candlelit vigil for the victims of male sexual violence is punctuated by chants of ‘Dick Out!’ They may well get rid of Dick, but their affront at male sexual oppression will not get soothed until they pull their aloe-veraed fingers out. This is of course the same Dick who…
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Yankee Candle Randy
A woman has been attacked and has lost her life, which needs no more words in itself. A grotesque and appalling tragedy. Violence against women is a problem and needs to be tackled. But these are not revelations. How is it that one event can trigger such an outpouring now at this moment in time?…
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Cock Walking
‘One day you’re cock of the walk, the next a feather duster’ reads the strapline on Piers Morgan’s Twitter profile. More like, ‘One day you’re cock of the walk, the next a cock walking’. There, I’ve fixed it for you. Morgan’s supporters have cohered behind the #TeamPiers banner although this does seem to have attracted…
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Fighting the Good Fight…
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