Tag: Keir Starmer
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Safegate
‘We don’t have a replacement for Kalvin Phillips’. Let that sink in for a moment. Gareth Southgate has a team that should be bubbling with the Bundesliga top scorer, the season’s outstanding player in La Liga, and a fresh dollop of Premiership cream. And yet, he is bamboozled by the challenge of replacing a player…
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General Erections
We’re a fortnight or so into the General Election campaign, and frankly it’s not pretty – unless pretty boring counts. Slippery Sunake has slithered from gaffe to gaffe, and the latest D-Day debacle has surely sealed his fate. I wouldn’t be surprised if the Tories ditched him mid-campaign in a coup d’étwat. As for Slur…
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Confidence Trick
Chaos reigns in the parallel universe of UK Politics. Hard-right loon Natalie Hellfucke has defected to Labour. Not only that, but Sir Drear has been parading her centre-stage. Not sure what the fuss is all about, though? It’s hardly a surprise that Starmer, a man who has no evident political compass, is a ruthless and…
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Stop the Ride
Oh dear – the chickens are coming home to roost for Slur Keir. He had previously latched onto the antisemitism gig in order to defenestrate Jezza, and now finds he’s mounted the wrong horse. If only the king of cardboard could argue that criticism of Israel is not antisemitism…. Bummer. That’s what happens to people…
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D’You Wanna Be In My Gang?
You can throw glitter on a turd, but it’s still a turd. After something sparkly finally stuck to Keir Starmer yesterday, the nihilist knight remarked that the protester ‘didn’t know him’. That was evident from the fact that glitter had been launched, not acid. It’s not yet known whether the assailant will be charged with…
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Them Apples
Slur Keith Starmer is now determined to treat people smugglers on a par with terrorists. Bravo. I’m not sure whether that means he’s going to be launching missiles onto the channel dinghies or putting ISIS warlords up in taxpayer-funded, plush hotel accommodation in Kent. Don’t expect Inaction Man to provide any clarification soon. Amazingly, Donkey…
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The Sniff Test
Ever wondered why politics seems so baffling? It’s because very little nowadays follows any predictable or logical course. This week, Rishi Sunak opined that Vlodosmear Zelensky ought to have given an address at the Eurovision Song Contest. Next, they’ll be haggling for Les Dennis to rock up at the United Nations. They say that every…
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Diane Breath
I’m no Diane Abbott acolyte – after all, the daft old bint blocked me on Twitter an age ago for mocking her abysmal arithmetic. So what if she has made a bad point, or if she defines ‘racism’ a little differently to others? Isn’t that what politics is all about? She’s just saying that those…
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Snookered
I’m old enough to remember when Keir Starmer and the new-old-New Labour acolytes whipped themselves into group hysteria at Boris Johnson’s claim that their boss had failed to prosecute Jimmy Savile. He was only the Director of Public Prosecutions after all – but, as he said, he had no direct responsibility for the case. We…
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Cock Blocking
Hold my lippie, sanity has indeed prevailed. Yes, Scottish geezers are still free to cosplay north of the border with their gender recognition certificates even if what they’re holding in the one hand is as scarcely convincing as the big ole hairy balls they have in the other. After all, we are all free to…
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