Category: Politics
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Shit Hoyle
How many of us are looking forward to a holiday in Stockton-on-Tees? None. Because it’s a shithole. Let’s take a moment to celebrate all the national journalists who have flocked to buy properties in Stockton. Unfortunately, there are none. Because it’s a shithole. Even the inhabitants of Stockton think it’s a shithole – once they’ve…
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Stop the Ride
Oh dear – the chickens are coming home to roost for Slur Keir. He had previously latched onto the antisemitism gig in order to defenestrate Jezza, and now finds he’s mounted the wrong horse. If only the king of cardboard could argue that criticism of Israel is not antisemitism…. Bummer. That’s what happens to people…
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D’You Wanna Be In My Gang?
You can throw glitter on a turd, but it’s still a turd. After something sparkly finally stuck to Keir Starmer yesterday, the nihilist knight remarked that the protester ‘didn’t know him’. That was evident from the fact that glitter had been launched, not acid. It’s not yet known whether the assailant will be charged with…
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Them Apples
Slur Keith Starmer is now determined to treat people smugglers on a par with terrorists. Bravo. I’m not sure whether that means he’s going to be launching missiles onto the channel dinghies or putting ISIS warlords up in taxpayer-funded, plush hotel accommodation in Kent. Don’t expect Inaction Man to provide any clarification soon. Amazingly, Donkey…
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Doing a Runner
It took a while, but the country has come to its senses. Johnson has been canned. Or rather, a select committee tee-ed him up, and he fell on his (pork) sword. Like Phillip Schofield, whom we have not seen for a few days, Phat Phuck has done a runner. As fagged-out Phil poignantly asked, ‘How…
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The Sniff Test
Ever wondered why politics seems so baffling? It’s because very little nowadays follows any predictable or logical course. This week, Rishi Sunak opined that Vlodosmear Zelensky ought to have given an address at the Eurovision Song Contest. Next, they’ll be haggling for Les Dennis to rock up at the United Nations. They say that every…
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Diane Breath
I’m no Diane Abbott acolyte – after all, the daft old bint blocked me on Twitter an age ago for mocking her abysmal arithmetic. So what if she has made a bad point, or if she defines ‘racism’ a little differently to others? Isn’t that what politics is all about? She’s just saying that those…
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Snookered
I’m old enough to remember when Keir Starmer and the new-old-New Labour acolytes whipped themselves into group hysteria at Boris Johnson’s claim that their boss had failed to prosecute Jimmy Savile. He was only the Director of Public Prosecutions after all – but, as he said, he had no direct responsibility for the case. We…
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Timewasters
So, England snagged a win on Italian turf for the first time since 1961. Along the way, both fullbacks were booked for timewasting, which made the crowd wonder whether Gareth Southgate was up for a lifetime achievement award. Meanwhile, the Commons Standards Committee did their utmost to stepover past Boris and ended up going full…
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Snatch of the Day
Good evening. Match of the Day will still be showing tomorrow but some soli-dar-idee will mean action only and no expert punditry. Business as usual then. I’m personally torn on this issue. I passionately support freedom of speech, but witnessing the Leftwaffe’s kamikazes ploughing into empty fields without shots being fired makes my ring tingle.…
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