Tag: Elections
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Kimbaya
We’re approaching the home straight in Batley and Spen, and Slur Clear Stammer may well shortly be staring down the barrel of laughs of a leadership challenge. Given the shocking calibre of the Labour benches, it’s certainly not going to get out of slapstick gear, but that’s for another day. If Labour do get resoundingly…
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Batty and Spent
The imminent by-election in Batley and Spen might prove to be a watershed for Drear Harmer’s leadershit (not a typo), if it has not indeed already hit the (silly old) buffers. In terms of candidate selection, Labour can at least be praised for not having plucked a self-serving, fake social democrat droid from the political…
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Ho-De-Hopeless
This week, Diabolic Cummings released WhatsApp messages in which Boris Johnson had denounced Matt Hancock as ‘hopeless’. For his part, Hancock had then responded to a press question of, ‘are you hopeless?’ with a, ‘I don’t think so’. He didn’t sound too convinced either way. Poor old door matt – however, the way he’s survived…
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Knee Jerk
Reportedly, Gareth Southgate is to hold urgent talks with the England squad about taking the knee. In all truth, he’d be better off talking to them about taking the piss. That performance versus Austrian opposition would have had Neville Chamberlain’s paper fluttering in the wind. In elite football terms, we’re not waving but drowning. As…
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Ropey Handle
Oh dear. The way things are going, some sizeable chunks of that Chinese rocket are likely to rain down on Keith’s gas guzzler. As matters stand, you could probably cut through the atmosphere at Labour HQ with a knife, let alone giant shards of Beijing tin can. And this time, there’s no convenient Corbed ball…
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Cardboard Box
I truly felt for Keir Starmer out there yesterday attempting a few punches at the large bag. I’m surprised only that one of the onlookers did not throw in the towel right there and then. It all evoked memories of Bill Gates on stage throwing some shapes at the Windows 95 launch. As he tossed…
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