Tag: Tories
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Cleverly Done
I laughed so much, a little bit of wee came out. Stratospheric frontrunner James Cleverly lent votes for a carve-up and ended up rogered and out. Apparently, he was so blasé about a thumping victory, he frittered away the death throes of his candidacy at Boris Johnson’s book launch rather than canvassing on the final furlong…
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Not Good for the Gander
Another day, another fuck to add to the cluster. Kemi Badenoch – remember her? The hapless grunt in the crowd who fortuitously caught the baseball of opportunity and accordingly concluded she was a major league player. Yes, she actually believes she might end up as the PM. Mind you, considering the shitpipes who did snag…
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Shit Hoyle
How many of us are looking forward to a holiday in Stockton-on-Tees? None. Because it’s a shithole. Let’s take a moment to celebrate all the national journalists who have flocked to buy properties in Stockton. Unfortunately, there are none. Because it’s a shithole. Even the inhabitants of Stockton think it’s a shithole – once they’ve…
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Diane Breath
I’m no Diane Abbott acolyte – after all, the daft old bint blocked me on Twitter an age ago for mocking her abysmal arithmetic. So what if she has made a bad point, or if she defines ‘racism’ a little differently to others? Isn’t that what politics is all about? She’s just saying that those…
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Cock Blocking
Hold my lippie, sanity has indeed prevailed. Yes, Scottish geezers are still free to cosplay north of the border with their gender recognition certificates even if what they’re holding in the one hand is as scarcely convincing as the big ole hairy balls they have in the other. After all, we are all free to…
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A Man Walks Into a Bra…
Just as the trans agenda burps up a social shield for gender-benders, door Matt Hancock has discovered the plan B fallback of every me-me-me charlatan – the hidden disability. Yes, the big cock has squeezed out his personal cheese – he’s dyslexic. While the public was poised to slate him for being as thick as…
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Indian Giver
So, there we have it: Rishi Sunak is the new prime minister. He is not of course the UK’s first ethnic minority PM – that honour went to Disraeli who was top Jew before top dude. As for what the bijou berk might bring, he’s screams stability only via his personal low centre of gravity.…
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Kwasi Little Thing Called Gov
It’s been a grim couple of weeks here in UK with the passing of The Queen. We’ve been celebrating the life of a consummate professional devoted to public service, which to be fair is something of a culture shock. And nobody has captured the disposition of this Conservative Government better than Kwasi Kwarteng. Well, we’re…
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Truss Issues
Back in the day, to truss meant to tie up the wings and legs of (a chicken or other bird) before cooking. The prey got trussed before it got stuffed. And now, life imitates art, as they say. Therese Coffey, her of the Savile cigar and fist-screwed glass, is the new Health Secretary. I’ll wager…
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The Race to the Bottom
And so the candidate debate came and went. If you are happy to commit to any one of these woeful cretins, you’re a braver man than I. I couldn’t imagine anything more daunting. Were all heading for a bad knock in the very near future, made worse by the little trust in our politics. Soon…
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