Category: Politics
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Bream On
While no fan of the rubber bath toy at all, his ‘I have a bream’ speech was a masterclass in hooking the usual gang of wet, flaccid Euromelts and consigning them to the Tory keepnet. Comparing the Ukrainian resistance to the Brexiter push for freedom was a jolly jape that perfectly piqued all the posturing…
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All Aboard!
Ever wondered what happened to the Black Lives Matter/trans rights/pride/me too/disability advocate/COVID extremist/Remainiac tools? Yep – they’re all ‘standing with Ukraine’. If they truly were, they’d be on a plane to Poland or Moldova, crossing the border, snatching up a rifle, and getting busy. Even Kerry Katona has issued a warning to Putin. Let’s hope…
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Casino
With Mr Putin recognising the republics of Donetsk and Luhansk, every limp foghorn in the crass commentariat has been quick to point to the ‘Kremlin playbook’, as if they’re diplomatic svengalis. Yet, in truth this kind of land-grab is a favoured standby for every regime with a penchant for expansionism. Hitler did it in the…
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The Best Lines
At last we had sight of the Sue Gray report, for all the progress that meant. Starmer delivered a withering speech, which was well-composed, accurate, and powerful. What a shame his speechwriter isn’t gunning for the top job. At the moment, the Labour front bench is undoubtedly getting all the best lines (guffaw), but none…
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Shambollocks
As a nation, we all still appear to be in perpetual shock that in voting for Boris Johnson, we ended up getting Boris Johnson. He is clearly the toast of the Conservative Party, of course in the crispy, charred sense. For a loquacious smith of words, his non-apology was as transparent as Fishy Rishi’s 200-mile-away…
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Going With the Flow
Novak Djokovic has just been nicked, which should make for a fascinating episode of Border Security: Australia’s Front Line in due course. He’s off to the relative comfort of a ‘detention hotel’ along with various miscreants with their undeclared apples, bags of fish guts, and dried cat penises. If he does appeal it, we’re all going to…
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Testy Times
So after nearly two years of mayhem, we’re back to where we started. Yes, we do have a vaccine, but it is one that works only by limiting serious illness in the most vulnerable after three jabs. It’s fascinating how the vaccine narrative has shifted from the heady euphoria of the first jab to the…
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Unsquared Circles
Hardly unpredictably, ‘Frosty the No Man’ became ‘Frosty the Go Man’, as Lord Frost departed the Cabinet. Notwithstanding the mystery of how he got in there in the first place – he is after all not even an MP – he belatedly discovered the crystal-clear truth that nobody can comfortably square the Brexit circle. The…
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Party Poop
As the covert party scandal unfolds, I for one am relieved that it wasn’t a bin bag covering a CCTV camera in that Downing Street shot of the Christmas quiz. That would have been a scandalous waste of PPE. Witnessing the defenstration of Dough Piffle will doubtless be delectable, but it won’t bring seismic change…
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No Offence
Once again, it’s by-election time, and the Bexley swing to Labour was by mid-term standards somewhat anaemic – about half of that achieved by Blair prior to 1997. Add to that the rock-bottom turnout, and you’re likely to draw the conclusion that this was scarcely a ringing endorsement of Sir Drear’s vision for the future.…
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