Author: Max Frances
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Stella Heights
Keith’s excruciating week has not got any better – he tried to sack Angela Rayner and ended up giving her three new jobs. Of course, he was lambasted for bombing out a working-class woman, but his critics failed to acknowledge that these were precisely the characteristics that had propelled her to such stellar heights in…
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Ropey Handle
Oh dear. The way things are going, some sizeable chunks of that Chinese rocket are likely to rain down on Keith’s gas guzzler. As matters stand, you could probably cut through the atmosphere at Labour HQ with a knife, let alone giant shards of Beijing tin can. And this time, there’s no convenient Corbed ball…
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Cardboard Box
I truly felt for Keir Starmer out there yesterday attempting a few punches at the large bag. I’m surprised only that one of the onlookers did not throw in the towel right there and then. It all evoked memories of Bill Gates on stage throwing some shapes at the Windows 95 launch. As he tossed…
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Barf-tas
The actor Noel Clarke has already been subjected to trial by media and found guilty. However this plays out, his career is scuppered. John Leslie could tell you all about that, and he was never ever convicted of any crime. But you won’t see any of the allegations taken down by social media operators, in…
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Never Knowingly Undertrolled
So Keith went out for a leisurely afternoon troll, pondering wallpaper in John Lewis to rustle up a photo op of sorts for the craven lefty press. Hilarious, Sir Drear. I was just surprised he hadn’t spent 3 hours poring over the plain magnolia before walking out empty-handed. At a time when it should be…
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Confirmation by Arse
So, the Downing Street interior decoration bill appears to have rattled some cages. Not sure why, because it’s not as if Johnson has pocketed the cash. He can’t take it all with him once he’s gone. At worst, he’s frittered some dough, but you would have thought that he’d have just done it himself, given…
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Gove Is in the Air
As predicted, Demonic Bummings has risen from the ashes, daggers drawn, and the stream of consciousness style of his turgid blog has swiftly transformed into a focused, tight, and determined front-stabbing. It’s almost as if he was assisted with it by a seasoned journalist well-versed in making each word count. Who’d have thunk it? Most…
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Flip Flop
You couldn’t make it up. The Free Speech Union has supported the ban on taking the knee at the Tokyo Olympics. One of their gang said: ‘The majority of people support banning taking the knee. It is divisive and doesn’t have much to do with kicking racism out of sport‘. That’s a belter. If shooting…
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Closed Shops
Well, that didn’t last long. The European Super League has received the red card, but that will likely not be the end of it. For now, the Big Six can return to the Premier League where they can revert to sucking up cash, buying in the best players, and operating without fear of relegation. One…
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Dropped Ball
Oceans of tears this weekend at the prospect of a European Football Super League, and there we were, being led to believe that Euro-integration was the future? If it is invitation-only, risk-free showboating, this isn’t a competition as such – it’s marketing content. Think Federer and Nadal hotdogging and pinging up 20-shot lob rallies with…
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